Sometimes though, I am lonely and I wonder if I should lower the bar a little so that I merely won't have to bask in my own company. Just a little sunlight in order to grow. I did that last year and I still regretted it. I opened the gates to someone who was so different to what I was looking for because I was lonely. I thought then that I was happy and that maybe this was it. I being very naive was wrong. He was my first boyfriend and my first mistake. I was happy with his company but later on I realised that my happiness was very shallow. I hate to admit this because I only realised much much later that . . .my first boyfriend was a distraction to my loneliness from a painful unrequainted love towards a guitarist who may never think of me the way I think of him.
It is quite sad that whenever I think of my ideal man or perfect lover, my thoughts fall upon the guitarist. Now that isn't so because I love him but it is more of that he ticked off everything on my list. Soemtimes, I believe the reason I can't let go of my hold of him is because of the very reason that he fit the image of my ideal man. He is someone. I may never encounter again. But then when I think about it. My ideal man would be more ideal if he was actually in love with me.
Lovesick Fool's expectations
- Good morals
- Muscian preferably classical guitarist
- hard worker
- good sense of humour
- intelligent enough to hold a good conversation
- martial artist
- Has goals in life
- Respects others no matter who
- Warm voice
- Loves books as much as I do
- Honest and truthful
- Loyal to friends and family
- Likes children
- Good patience
- Strong willed
- Good heart/understanding of others
- Likes to help others
- Nice smile
- Loves me completely and loves me because of my flaws
What about you? What are your expectations in men or women? Does your lover fit your list? And does it really matter? Voice your thoughts.