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Sunday, January 24, 2010

Waiting. . .

Inside this heart, I am waiting, sitting in the very corner of darkness. Please, if you're the one I'm waiting for, please open my door. And let in the light. If by chance you are not who I'm waiting for, please stay for a while and enjoy the peek of sunlight with me.

Secretly and unknowingly or maybe I had always known that whenever I write, I write for him. I write to find my fated one. I write for him to notice me and praise me. Our only connection is our love for words. I want my fated one to notice that I'm fated for him.

So unknowingly, this has become somewhere I've placed all the words meant for him. Even though, he shall never come to know its existance, this blog is a precious place. This blog, is where all my unsaid words go and forever will go. Because secretly, I would like for him to know these words. This voice of my heart.

Everyday, I ask myself 'What am I waiting for?' The question itself is simple but my answer is layered and complicated. I am waiting for the day where he will with his own initiative, talk to me. I am waiting for when my voice reaches his heart.
And I'm waiting for my fated one to notice that I'm fated for him.

I am not usually the type to wait but I know that I'm being very selfish with these one-sided feelings of mine and that he was probably troubled by these feelings so I wish to no longer to interfere with his happiness, even if his happiness is not with me. I am happy enough for now to have met him because he has occupied so much space in my heart, there is no longer any room for anyone else. It is because of him that I have hurt but because I hurt, I discovered these precious feelings.

Even though, we may not ever meet again in this life and I may find another, he shall always be my fated one who taught me how to love and how to express my love. I shall always remember him and always love him. Even after death, my soul will still remember him because I believe in the day that we will be together.

I am silently waiting for the voices of the heart broken to reach my fated one.

Do you believe in true Love?
If so Eternity is nothing. . .

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

it's hard to know what to do with yourself when you've met the person who makes your whole existence make sense. i completely relate to how all your words are really for him, the want for him to see you. and i relate to the way you've found beauty in the expressions of your longing.

ooohjodi said...

i know exactly how you feel.

tee said...

It's funny because just yesterday I posted an away message (call me archaic; I don't believe in Twitter) about how I felt like I was eternally waiting for something but I had no idea what it was. Great post.

--T

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