Dear Beloved Lovesick Fools
Have you ever deliberately ended a friendship before?
The decision and process is similar to ending a relationship: Its difficult. And people get hurt.
I have never once told someone that I no longer wanted to be friends.
However, I did so last night.
I did not end it because I hated him. It's the opposite. I love him.
I love him so much that it hurts. And no matter what I do I couldn't get over him. And I'm sure you're well aware that I did everything I could.
But it still hurts. The feeling never goes away. My heart always aches.
Every time I think I'm going to be ok or when I'm about to forget about him, he appears back into my life. Its hard to avoid someone when he lives in the same town and uses the same bus route.
Last night, I came to the conclusion that if I never see or speak to him again, I will be able to move on. The feelings will die. And I will find happiness on my own. So, I sent him a farewell letter and blocked/deleted him from my msn. He was a good friend and I'm happy that I met him. But I hope that I don't ever meet him again until I can look at him in the eye and smile without hurting.
I wonder if I made the right choice? But I guess its too late for regrets.
I cannot go back on my words. I have to be strong. I hope that one day we could be friends again.
Wish me luck,
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